Nausea..

Nausea, its a funny thing, well not really but when you think about it, it is just strange.  When I first found out I had breast cancer I threw up.  I think it was a combination of fear, shock and complete disbelief.  I didn't know what to do or feel and that was the first thing that came to me.  Now I fight everyday not to throw up.  I take my meds and drink as much water as I can but it still creeps in.  I don't think there is a more unpleasant felling then knowing it is coming or actually doing it.  I really hope with my next cocktail this feeling goes away.  The worst days are day 5-7 after my treatment.  Tea seems to help a lot and thanks to my friends and family I have enough tea for the long hall and a collection of my favorite mugs to transport me during the day to a far off place.  It is kind of ironic that I can't taste anything but yet still get nausea, wouldn't you think it would be something you ate that would give you an upset stomach?

I still think I can do anything and can keep my normal activities but quickly find out that is not the case.  We had 2 soccer games and 2 football games yesterday and then went to the Kings game with some good friends (thanks Millers!).  I ended up taking 2 naps between all the games and headed out to the Staples Center.  We didn't stay till the end, I just get so tired it is so annoying!  I feel like I am 100.  When I first started going to the oncology department at the hospital it was a little unnerving, okay a lot!  Everyone looked 100 and it felt like a morgue!  Now I know why even the smallest activity is so taxing.  I am so looking forward to the holidays coming up but at the same time it makes me nervous because I don't want anything to be different for the kids or for me.  I so love the fall and Thanksgiving and of course Christmas it is always such a fun time.  I so look forward to all the cooking but something about not being able to taste any of it does not sound like fun at all!

The newest fun nugget of side effects is numbness, my mouth still gets sore at about day 5 and gradually gets worse until day 10 but now my lips are starting to get tingly and numb as well, mostly in the morning.  My finger seems to be getting better although the cut is taking forever to heal the swelling has gone down and the redness is almost gone.  I am getting better with my lack of hair, I have a favorite thin bean that I wear all the time and my head is not as sensitive as it was.  I am even able to go to bed without a bean but have to keep one close because by 4am my head gets pretty cold.  I would like it a bit more if the weather would cooperate a bit because the heat does not go with my outfit!

As always thank you for all the love and support!  I received the most beautiful flower arrangements this week that really brightened my week!  Thanks so much.... thank you notes are on the way, I promise!